October 2 , 2006
permanent
link
Today is the day to splurge on a new cereal.
Chicagoans--don't forget that I will be at the Dollar Store on Friday.
Yesterday I picked up a copy of Conscious Choice magazine, which I tend to find quite entertaining and informative. I was interested to see an ad for something called a Visa "enlightenment card", which is a credit card for crazy vegetarians. Here are some of the perks of signing up for the Enlightenment Card:
Reward Program: Earn 1 Enlightenment Point for every $1 of purchases which can be used to redeem a wide variety of merchandise and services including colon hydrotherapy with wheat grass, complimentary spiritual circle time and angel buttons.
No expiration on points: The enlightenment points that you earn do not expire and carry over into your next life.
24-Hour Customer Service: Guaranteed authentic Tibetan or Indian wise person to help you with all your needs.
Complimentary energy healing for pets.
Annual Fee: What is time? (Fee is $50 for every lunar cycle)
Variable Rate Information: Your APR for Purchases may vary based on your rising sign
Guaranteed Smugness Factor: When you take out your Visa Enlightenment Card featuring your choice of art of an Ohm signal, praying hands, the Sun or a light-hand-montage-thing, you will feel 20% better about yourself as you buy your toilet paper than a consumer with any other novelty credit card.
Are you a fan of Zulkey.com but don't have time to read it daily? Sign up
for the semireliable newsletter!:
email:
Powered by NotifyList.com
Advertisements:
BuySellTix is the Theatre Ticket center for The Lion King Tickets and other Broadway events
See Broadway this year with Three Days of Rain Tickets, Tarzan Tickets, Python Spamalot Tickets, Wedding Singer Tickets and Jersey Boys Tickets.