July
2, 2003
permanent
link
Today
is the day to make backsweat cool.
Rank: Ways of Eating
- Solids with a spoon. Jell-o, macaroni and cheese cereal, and, in my family's
case, Grandma Buren's special. IT's comforting ad it facilitates really
shoveling it in. Downsides: Doesn't really give you a lot of credibility,
especially if you're a head of state.
- Knife & fork. A classic. Downsides: Ever in a restaurant and you drop
your knife on the floor? You just leave it that? Don't you feel lazy? Isn't
that embarrassing?
- Anything lobster-related. Those tiny knives and forks and crackers and
things are really fun. Downsides: You don't get to use them that often and
they don't really work, do they?
- Chopsticks. They make eating more fun and they make you just a little
more superior than the fork-using hoi polloi. Downsides: Everything tastes
like wood and it's impossible to really eat rice and this is America.
- Straw. Milkshakes are delicious. Downsides: You're not really eating,
no matter how delicious they say Slim Fast is.
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All original work on this site is copyright 2002-03, Claire
Zulkey
