'

 

April 23, 2007
permanent link

Today is the day to be peaceful and nice.

There is literally only ONE T-SHIRT LEFT! Buy it now!

I just want to warn everyone that this blog will probably not exist by the time summer comes, because I will have turned into a lizard, or a fish, or possibly just a cell.

This weekend I watched a show I had Tivo'd called "Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School Starring Mo'Nique." I didn't watch "Flavor of Love," the spin off of a spin off of a 'celebreality' TV show, but the promos for this show looked cute, and I wanted in. I figured that the creators of the show would make it easy for newbies like me by explaining who these various Flavor of Love girls were.

They did, thankfully. These girls are spitting, eye-rolling, weave-pulling, finger-twirling, "aw HELL naw" and "this is some BULLSHIT" variations of each other, a beautiful melting pot of divas and babymammas of all colors. Basically, what the show is about is taking all the vulgarity and sass out of the women and making them nice, and presentable, or something, and giving $50,000 to the 'winner.' The show is hosted and judged by the comedienne Mo'Nique, author of the book Skinny Women are Evil!, which I happen to own for research purposes (seriously.)

The first episode was pretty boring, however. The girls arrive at the standard mansion that Vh1 shows are taped in, and we see flashbacks to their rowdier days. Then, Mo'Nique strips them of their former Flava Flav-granted nicknames like "Buckwild" and "Bootz" and "Pumkin" and "Hottie" (except for a girl named Saaphyri, because she never got a nickname.Then they have to go camping. Yawn.

My favorite of the girls are Buckwhile (Becky), "the blackest white girl alive," who is clearly a dorky girl with an endearingly nerdy laugh beneath her keepin' it real exterior. I also like Goldie (Courtney), because she's funny, and Hottie (Schatar) because of her ridiculous Paris Hilton weave and the sound effect of a bicycle bell ringing the producers put in every time she blinks her big cartoon eyes.

I was planning on deleting the episode, never to watch again, but then I was shown a preview of the entire season, which showed the promise of much more hair-pulling, boob-squeezing, screaming and slapping than I was given in this debut episode. So I set to record the next episode.

We'll see how it goes. As I watched this show I could feel on the sides of my neck a protuberance, which I assumed was a pair of gills returning from my pre-human days. The bottom of my back itches, and I think it's my prehensile tail growing back. I'm obviously devolving, thanks to the TV I'm watching, so if I'm still watching "Charm School" by the end of the season, please make sure you just provide me with an a nice terrarium and a piece of lettuce, and put the tank in front of the TV while you're at it.

Read Diary Archives

Are you a fan of Zulkey.com but don't have time to read it daily? Sign up for the semireliable newsletter!:
email:
Powered by NotifyList.com

Advertisements:

Ticket Solutions
Gwen Stefani tickets
Justin Timberlake tickets
Wicked tickets
Stomp tickets
Genesis tickets

Concert tickets
theater tickets

sports tickets
Baseball tickets

Sell Tickets!
 

JustGreatTickets.com
Theater Tickets
Concert Tickets
Sports Tickets
Wicked Tickets

Razorgator Event Tickets
Our friends at Razorgator specialize in Hard-to-Get tickets to Sports, NASCAR Tickets, and Concert tickets  for every city in the US.
Hard-to-Get Events
NFL tickets
2007 Super Bowl Tickets
Daytona 500 Tickets
Braves tickets
Lakers Tickets
Mavericks tickets
High School Musical Tickets

BuySellTix is the Theatre Ticket center for The Lion King Tickets and other Broadway events

See Broadway this year with Three Days of Rain Tickets, Tarzan Tickets, Python Spamalot Tickets, Wedding Singer Tickets and Jersey Boys Tickets.