February 26, 2007
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Today is the day to take some coffee to go.
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One of the issues that the celebrities congratulated themselves on last night at the Oscars was how the ceremony had 'gone green.' As far as I could tell, what this entailed was that some celebrities arrived at the ceremonies in hybrid limousines.
While this is an admirable sacrifice (I guess), based on my own forced and half-assed attempts at environmentalism, I'd like to propose some ways that the Academy can prevent an even more eco-friendly ceremony next year: ·Instead of many hybrid limousines, why don't all the actors pile into a big bus and share transportation to the event? One bus, even if it's not hybrid, must emit less fuel than many limousines. It would be especially great if there were designated stops for the performers to be picked up at, instead of the bus having to stop at everyone's house. This would provide for great photo ops for looky-loos. To make things fancy, they could have a cooler of pop on the bus. ·Instead of purses, the actresses could re-use plastic shopping bags from the grocery store to carry their goods. ·)Swag bags could be given out as prizes for the celebs who bring in the most trash that they picked up by the side of the road. · The Oscar statues could be made out of aluminum foil. · Macaroni necklaces instead of diamonds. · If the new florescent lights are not available, perhaps light the show via candlelight: judging by Diane Keaton and Jack Nicholson's sunglasses, it's too bright in that theater anyway. · Instead of an actual ceremony per se, why don't we just have it all done online, like the Webbys? This would save a lot of time and energy and everyone could sit at home and vote in the comfort of their own homes. That sounds much more comfortable than a bunch of double sided tape and high heels, anyway.
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