Who is Shirleylocks?
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Last night, my dad, who I am convinced was the inspiration for this sketch, told me that a sweater I happened to be wearing made me look like "Shirleylocks." My brother and I just looked at him but my mom said, "Who?!" We knew who he meant, of course. (Although his follow-up claim that my sweater made me somehow look "German," was never really proven. I think it was not-coincidental timing that he knocked over a bottle of wine when pressed further.)
Anyway, last night I asked on Facebook and Twitter, "Who is Shirleylocks?" Here were some intriguing suggestions:
Kimmy B: "Female Sherlock Holmes (dark and dapper"
Monte C: "I'm going with Shirley Maclaine with dreadlocks. Ya mon!"
Ted C: "Shirley Temple, as Goldilocks"
Kirsten P: "Shirley Feeney (cardigan) meets Shirley Temple (ruffles)."
Lydia N: "The sweater reads as virtue. Chastity. As in: This surely locks."
CJ L: "Partridge Family Salmon?"
Mike P: "Incompetent locksmith with a heart of gold."
Susannah B: "Shirleylocks, the big-breasted whore who used to dance at Pinky's, is pregnant, homeless, and bleeding. At least she has her sweater."
and Gary S: "Shirleylocks, a girl most impressed with Bill Cosby's taste in sweaters and the story of Samson & Delilah, she cut off all her hair and put on her favorite mohair blouse when her longtime love interest went on to appear on RuPaul's Drag Race and revealed he was a homosexual. She went on to have a successful career as a Shirley Caesar impersonator. End."